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Title: Chapter 17 Reviewer: Bzf Signed

Oh my! Where to begin?  The gently woven story structure, the honest and true dialogue, the easy flow from one picturesquely worded paragraph to the next evolving emotion - all left this reader deeply and pleasurably engrossed for an entire Sunday afternoon.  Throughout, your use of the yellow/gold imagery (loved the "like a snake in sunshine") and your insightfulness (love isn't the problem, loss is) lend depth.  Absolutely loved and thoroughly appreciated your ability to end each chapter with a gut punch line that captured the essence of that chapter, cast some foreshadowing, and elevated the reader to somewhere beyond the story.  Thank you, Lisal.



Author's Response:

I don't know how to thank you for this, Bzf.  What a throughtful, generous and intelligently written review.   I'm beyond thrilled that this story gave you a pleasant Sunday afternoon and touched you liked it enough to write this.  I love the process of writing about our boys but when another fan likes your work, it makes it even more worthwhile.  Thank you so, so, so much.  

Date: 08/16/2020 - 07:27 pm [Report This]
Title: Chapter 17 Reviewer: Tahoe Lee Signed

The unplanned meeting in chapter 13 was great.  Very realistic and true to character. Sometimes those are the best kind. 

Such an emotional scene between Ben and Adam.  Little Joe is sweet and made me smile.

A poignant ending to a moving and sensitive story.  Well done! 

 



Author's Response:

Thank you for reading this again, Tahoe Lee and for these generous and kind reviews - and also all of the support you gave me while writing it.  I really appreciate you taking the time to do this over the chapters.  It means a lot.  

 

 

Date: 08/08/2020 - 02:26 pm [Report This]
Title: Chapter 12 Reviewer: Tahoe Lee Signed

The surprise in the barn was very unexpected.  What a great twist.  The anticipation you created was so good.

Bittersweet with suspense.  Something is looming on the horizon.

 

Chapters (10-12)

 

Date: 08/08/2020 - 02:23 pm [Report This]
Title: Chapter 9 Reviewer: Tahoe Lee Signed

A riveting scene between Adam and Bonnie.  Good stuff!

You've weaved romance with family very effectively. 

Hop Sing came to mind in chapter 9.

Their unbreakable bond is evident in this story.  Love the interaction between Adam and Little Joe.  So special.

 

Chapters (7-9)

 



Author's Response:

I'm glad you notice Joe and Adam's bond (or actually, the entire family's) - despite the drama and romance in this, it is the family relationship that always matters most to me in writing.  And I believe Joe must have adored Adam as a child - or really, all the way up through.  

 

Funny - Hop Sing came to mind for me, too -  throughout the story -  but I already had Lem and was trying to stay true to my original version.  Plus, I like Lem - haha.  I am sure Ben finds Hop Sing soon after this story ends.  

Date: 08/08/2020 - 02:21 pm [Report This]
Title: Chapter 6 Reviewer: Tahoe Lee Signed

You really tapped into their emotions in chapter 4.  The encounter between Adam and Bonnie and then between Ben and Bonnie.  Wow!  Even anger that is restrained can be a powerful force.

You've portrayed his innocence beautifully.

Love the barn scene and how it ended.  Ben is sharp!

 

Chapters (4-6)

 

Date: 08/08/2020 - 02:18 pm [Report This]
Title: Chapter 3 Reviewer: Tahoe Lee Signed

I enjoyed this story when it was a WIP.  I'm eager to read it again as one piece.

Ben was very protective over his boys.  After Marie died, he found himself a single parent once again.  As usual, his instincts were right on target.

Lovely description of them in the meadow.  Peaceful and serene setting.

I thought Lem to be older because of his wisdom.  Although he annoys Ben at times, he's also street smart and an asset to him.

Nice ending to chapter 3.

 

Chapters (1-3)

 



Author's Response:

Again, thank you, TL.  I'm very touched by these  reviews.   I wrote this knowing it wasn't going to be a hit with everyone  so knowing you were moved by it is very inspiring to me.  

Date: 08/08/2020 - 02:16 pm [Report This]
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